Q: Kathryn, I feel so stuck in my life. I had a rough childhood and am so happy that at last I’m on my own now

But I hate my job and am barely making ends meet. And on top of that, I can’t seem to keep anyone I’m interested in

The ones I don’t want will come around but when I finally meet someone interesting (let’s call the last one “Phil), he’ll drift away after a few months together

Phil broke up with me last weekend and said he just wasn’t feeling it. After telling me at first that he could see a future with me and couldn’t stop thinking of me!!!

I’m so frustrated. How is my life nothing like I want it? I’m too old to keep doing this and pretty despairing at this point

Please help me. I’m extremely sick of my life right now

A: I’m so sorry you are suffering, and I totally get it

I’m glad you reached out, though, because I can help

Congrats on making it to adulthood and out of your bad childhood!

Unfortunately, it’s far too easy to get in a rut and not be able to pull yourself any further . . . just what you are experiencing now

So it really IS time to do something new to get different results, right?

It’s something I help so many do, even when they’d just about given up

So WHAT is the secret to surpassing yourself or even your family pattern? To getting unstuck & going beyond where you’ve ever been?

There are 2 ways that I use to help folks break through, and it’s why my success rate is so high . . . even for HOLDOUTS, those who don’t manifest easily

1. Think back to when you’ve had a breakthrough before – even like when you finally got to adulthood and could break free from your upbringing. Remember that exhilarating energy when you’ve leapt forward?

As you recapture that feeling, you can use it to propel yourself to where you want to go . . . even if it’s a totally different area of your life

2. Get pulled there by someone who is where you want to be

This second way is what my work does well, and it’s why so many people take a class from me and almost immediately break through to the love they’ve wanted for so long

I pull people with my writings and groups to a new and amazing level. I recently celebrated my 16th  year of being married to my soulmate and have a huge track record with thousands of weddings

My work provides a jolt of hope and openings, so that love walks right into the door . . . and you never look back

And other things show up, too, like the right profession, money and more

Q: Kathryn, summer is here, and I'm beyond ready for love. What can I do to find love this summer? I'm feeling more hopeful than usual.

A: Your hopefulness is already making you more magnetic to love. I hope you'll concentrate on keeping that faith and also having fun this summer.

In addition, here are 4 tips to make this your summer of love!

  • 4 Hot Tips to Attract Love

1. SIGNAL: If you are a woman, give a nonverbal signal when you're interested in a man. Prolonged eye contact can bring someone all the way across a crowded room. Despite what the bestseller THE RULES, says (let him make the first move), studies show that men generally will not approach a woman until they've gotten some signal of interest, whether it's a nod, a smile or simply a friendly eye gaze.

And no matter what gender you are, seeking a connection, being curious and warm toward someone makes you irresistible.

2. BE YOURSELF. Some experts say that you need to act this way or look that way, but studies don't bear out the notion of fitting yourself into some general mold of desirability. Reasons for attraction are so varied and so individual-specific that your best bet is to just be who you are, the most positive YOU with confidence, and the person who is attracted to your qualities will not be able to see past you.

One formerly single mom client who is now on my wall of weddings was always told she was too quiet and withdrawn to find love. As she did my work, an uncle showed up to pick up a child at her house from a playdate. He was taken with her and loved what a good listener she was.

It took him 45 minutes to collect his nephew and leave. He made sure he had her number before he drove away. The rest is history - the two tied the knot 18 months later. Not only did this show that love would come to her door but also that she never had to be something she was not. Her new husband adores her contemplative, sensitive nature. They're a perfect fit.

3. FORGET LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT and give an emotional bond and the ensuing chemistry time to develop. Studies overwhelmingly show that physical attraction levels vary between the first meeting and a deeper bonding time. Either the attraction grows or it peters out as the couple get to know each other. Many peopledevelop crushes with repeated exposure to an individual who they at first didn't find attractive which explains the phenomenon of office romances.

Just have fun this summer, enjoy flirting and bonding, and as you give love a chance to dawn, it will.

4. DO WHAT FITS YOU. If you're not the bar or on-line type, don't force yourself to visit bars or do the on-line dating thing. Studies show that the way people meet are so varied that you can't predict when love will happen. Chances are that if you don't like bars, you're not going to meet someone compatible in one. Better to do what feels natural to you and trust that love will find you.

  • Love Life Affirmation 
    I connect with my soulmate. I commit to him (or her). We are one. I continue to open to love. I am a magnet for my love this summer.