Love Repellent #2

Love repellent #2 is something that far too many people have no clue they're doing

When I work with people, they do it almost unanimously without realizing it

And yet it is the key to connecting, to being sought after and even winning a bucket load of money


THE LOVE REPELLENT

What is this wrongheaded behavior that will repel love?

It's making it all about you without even knowing it

-This is something you may not even realize you do

- Many people make the huge mistake of thinking that they must come across as dazzling and fascinating to attract anyone

- That is a very self-centered and wrongheaded notion

- Believe it or or not, when you become self-conscious, you are guilty of this, too

- When you get self-conscious, you're making it all about you when there is another person in front of you who needs to connect

- I literally have to train most of my students how to have an engaging conversation when faced with someone hot (most likely to be your soulmate)

- If you can do this differently, research shows that you will get 80% more second dates



THE ANTIDOTE


So what can you do to be less self-centered and truly connect with someone you want to?

Here is the antidote:

1. Make sure your conversations go like this: you talk - they talk - you talk (no monologues allowed)

2. Worry more about being a good listener than how you come across. Shelf the self-consciousness as very self-centered. You don't have time for that!

3. Now here's the part that gets people 80% more second dates. Ask follow-up questions. The simple act of listening well enough to really hear and then asking for more clarification will bond you to the point where your love interest must see you again

4. Why does this work so well? Research shows that our brains light up more when we talk about ourselves than when we are either having sex or eating. LOL!


HE WON $500K BY AVOIDING REPELLENT #2


A life coach that I hired won half a million dollars at age 24 by avoiding this repellent. He was a contestant on a major network's game show.

And he noticed that none of his fellow contestants asked him anything about his life. Ever! They fell into the trap of Repellent #2 probably without realizing it.

But this coach knew better than to fall into Repellent #2. Instead of making it all about him, this naturally quiet guy asked everyone about their lives back home and really listened, asking many follow-up questions.

He ended up getting the only unanimous vote in the history of the game to win half a million dollars. Plus he won another $50,000 by being voted the viewers' favorite, too.

All because he had bonded with his fellow contestants by really listening to them, something that no one else did.


YOUR HOMEWORK

In the next week, combine the homework from Repellent #1 (being warm in your voice and face -- hopefully, you're getting good at this!) with this new piece - ask follow-up questions, really listen and engage with other people


Quit making it about you but just be super interested in THEM. It will help you in love. People will be mysteriously drawn to you. And it can help in work or even in a game show :)


Stay tuned for the Love Repellent #3 in next week's email. Overcoming this one resulted in a romance for the ages ♥